Waiting to Exhale

Technically, I can exhale just fine.  I suppose if I’m waiting for anything, it’s to meet the newest member of our family.  Who, it seems, has decided to live indefinitely in my belly. 

Come out, come out, whenever you want!

Once, a few months ago, I started a blog about not really liking surprises.  I can’t remember why and I obviously never posted it (or wrote it for that matter) but I remember it had something to do with my baby shower for The Ladybug.  I had NO idea that I was having one.  It was genius really, as my friends actually got me out of the house and had it at my house so when I came home, everyone yelled SURPRISE as I walked in.  I literally almost gave birth right there. 

As much as I liked that my friends had pulled a surprise shower off (I moped for a while, thinking no one loved me and I was going to have to eat worms), I still don’t really love surprises.  I like knowing the what/when/how of things.  That’s why I usually plan my own birthday parties.  I just like knowing what’s going on… or just that SOMETHING is going on. 

Birth- not so predictable.  The last time I had a baby, I went to the doctor on a Thursday and, at the appointment, he casually asked, “Do you want to have a baby now?”  I managed to stammer out a NO!, all the while, looking at Dave to make sure that was the correct answer.  It was.  But we scheduled an induction for the next day.  Part of me really appreciated taking the surprise element out of it.  No more waiting and wondering, no fear of my water breaking at school or in the middle of the night, and, most importantly, I was going to get to meet my sweet Ladybug. 

This time, I’m trying to wait it out.   I’m not sure if an induction was necessary last time.  I’ll never really know because A.) I’m not a doctor and B.) I didn’t bring the doctor’s number with me and C.) I’m not sure he’d admit it was unnecessary if I asked.  But I really don’t want to end up having another C-section, if it can be avoided because it was hard enough recovering the first time, without a Ladybug who is definitely not going to be interested in NOT climbing on me. 

But waiting is hard.  And, without getting too whiny, I’m tired and huge and it’s hot and there’s a watermelon on my bladder. 

So anytime you’re ready, I’m ready.  But maybe not at school.  Or in the middle of the night.  I like what little amount of sleep I’m still getting…


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